Thursday 24 December 2015

Merry Christmas 2015 to all my wonderful readers!


Basil's transformation

My heartfelt apologies to all my readers for my protracted absence from the blogosphere: the reason, in all its shocking detail, is as follows.

Firstly, my LA agent phoned me, offering me the lead role in a new blockbuster.  She was very mysterious about the details, but being the fame-whore that I am, I accepted without knowing any more.  More fool me!

Imagine my horror when I arrived on set, in downtown L.A., to discover the name of the film was "Lesbians who Lunch".  I was straight back on the flight to London with a swish of my skirts!



I've been knocked up in bed, diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and I have been popping prescription pills like Smarties.

Whilst recovering in my Buckinghamshire mansion, in an attempt to improve the appearance and deportment of my serving staff, I sent my maid, Basil, to a beauty clinic.  I'm tired of her belching like a Brazilian bullfrog in front of Lords and Ladies.  Basil was sent to He2She Transformations, of Watford.  Here are some Before and After photographs of her delicate transformation.


         BEFORE                                                                                   AFTER


It seems the Blueberry Face Mask caused an allergic reaction!