I've got 17 bathrooms here at Raffles, so I had one of these diamond-studded toilets installed in each bathroom. When you flush, the thing plays Greensleeves at full volume. Delightful! And, of course, it was necessary to buy some new toilet paper, too. So I chose the following design, completely bespoke. There's something so satisfying about my choice of design... and it doesn't feel scratchy on the bum like that horrid old tracing-paper stuff.
Unbleached, unpulped, soft-as-a-feather toilet tissue
with Belladonna the Maid's ugly face lovingly printed onto