Yeti Snow Beast spotted in North Bucks

TV News crews from all over the world have descended in a frenzy on the tiny village of Brill and this most rural part of North Bucks has become a hive of activity.

The reason?  These mysterious, gigantic footprints were found in the heavy snow, followed by numerous reports of villagers being molested by a 7ft, hairy, black, inconsolable monster.

The North Bucks Chronicle have also done a front-page story on it.  Have a read, it's the most astonishing bit of journalism I've ever read, quite simply the bees' knees. 

You may recall the incident that occurred on Sunday chez moi with Gladys Grove.  Accidentally on purpose, Gladys was sent blindly - and as drunk as a skunk - into my 2nd floor airing cupboard where I'm currently keeping several bee-hives, mistaking the room for the lavatory.  You might think it a very odd occurrence to be keeping bees in a 2nd floor airing cupboard, but my only defence is that it's very cold outside and the bees like it in there.

Gladys, a confirmed apiphobic, was last seen making a bee-line across fields in the general direction of the town of Haddenham, some 7 miles distant, covered from head to toe in bees.  She must have lost her sling-backs in a ditch somewhere, which explains her footprints in the snow (first picture, above).

I've got to commend the work of the artist who drew the impression of this Yeti Snow Beast, envisaged from the many sightings around the county.   It does seem like Gladys Grove has once again made the headlines, for all the wrong reasons.  Maybe it's time to come out of retirement, Gladys?  The world clearly craves you.

I must dash now, as I've got to go and get my photo done as it's time to re-new my passport, in readiness for my embarkation on my 180-days Around the World tour.  

Toodle-pip!