I'm
at my wit's end as to what to do about my maid, Belladonna (known by
her pet-name, Belladonna Bitchhole). This morning I went to Pets R Us -
a shop run by poodles, for poodles - and purchased 12 truckloads of
this delightful spray. When I got home and found Belladonna, I sprayed a
whole can in her face, the way police officers spray mace on Police Camera Action (my second favourite TV programme, after The Wombles). She's now weeping in the coal-shed, much sub-dued.
