Terrifying hallucination
After a night of whiskey chasers, fishbowls of rum punch and vodka slammers, I woke this morning, took a 2-hour bath in asses' milk and was just about to powder my nose in the ornate, gem-encrusted Louis Quatorze hand-mirror when I saw this terrifying vision. Not my face reflected in the mirror, but the ugly face of my uncouth maid, Basil. This was so disturbing I had to take an ice-bath and lay down in a darkened room for 3 hours. The sound of my vomiting was like a lorryload of coal being delivered. I've never had an hallucination in my life, before now, and I frequently pop Valium like they're a tube of Smarties, and follow it up by marijuana marmite on toast for breakfast.
Ohhhhhhh dear me, id had to have a good lie down too.
ReplyDelete"The sound of my vomiting was like a lorryload of coal being delivered."
ReplyDeleteYou are a lass of many talents !
I think Basil looks kind of cute.
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Where is Mitzi? Has Carmen done 'er in?
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Can't stop thinking of a certain Alfredo Garcia.
ReplyDeleteHello all my friends..... hello 63mago, Ms Scarlet, Mistress Maddie, Mitzi and Jane and Lance Hattatt,
ReplyDeleteI have received a telegram from Mitzi originating from "Benidorm, Espana". Mitzi says she is with Carmen and that Mitzi has just been crowned Miss Benidorm 2015 and is considering a career in acting. Carmen is in training alongside Sticky Vicky. currently working as a bearded lady!
Fanny xxx
Thank you for the update!
ReplyDeleteI look forward to seeing Mitzi taking over the Rovers in Corrie. She was made to play Liz McDonald!
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